When you have been in a relationship for so long, suddenly breaking up will be devastatingly hurtful and many times when people find themselves in situations like this, they often find themselves returning to their partners even when they know they probably should not.
The familiarity of a relationship is something that you cannot forget easily, especially if it is one that lasted for a while and so many great memories were created while you were at.
Even the relationship that ended for terrible, unbearable reasons such as remorseless cheating or domestic violence, are usually never filled with only bad times. It could be infrequent, but there will be highs as well. It is very unlikely that a relationship will be filled with only bad times.
And it is one of the reasons why people find themselves going back to their exes – for the comfort they are already used to.
Dr. Fran Walfish, relationship psychotherapist in Beverly says people return to an ex to stop feeling so lonely, and Martinez explains that one of the main reasons people return to exes is fear.
“People get back [with exes] because they want safety and familiarity,” Martinez tells Elite Daily. “It’s fear of going back to the dating scene, being open and vulnerable in a new relationship, or being heartbroken in a new relationship.”
She also lists financial concerns and unresolved feelings as other reasons some people may go to an ex.
“People seek the safety of a comfortable financial situation that a particular relationship may afford,” she says.
She also lists financial concerns and unresolved feelings as other reasons some people may go to an ex.
“People seek the safety of a comfortable financial situation that a particular relationship may afford,” she says.
In a general sense, many times when someone returns to an ex, it can be that “there’s still something left unresolved, or some additional lesson they need to learn in that relationship.”
